For families across Canada, the return to school signals a return to hectic schedules. A significant 86% of Canadian children engage in at least one extracurricular pursuit, with many families juggling even more commitments.
There is a plethora of activities to choose from—whether it’s baseball or Brownies, choir or crafting, martial arts or Mandarin lessons. While these engagements bring numerous advantages, overloading the calendar can have the opposite effect. What insights should parents consider?
The added value
Extracurricular programs offer children a chance to acquire new skills, extending beyond sports and music. They also gain essential soft skills like teamwork and dedication, while shaping their self-perception regarding their abilities and interests.
“These activities impart critical life lessons,” notes Cassandra White, a registered psychologist and director at Rocky Mountain Psychological Services in Calgary. “Experiencing setbacks, like not making the team or missing a goal, teaches children how to cope with disappointment.”
Research indicates that youngsters involved in extracurricular activities tend to achieve better academic results. As they mature, they are less prone to depression, more likely to complete their education, and less likely to engage in substance abuse.
Selecting the right activities
Which activities might be the best fit? For children, especially considering that 93% are not meeting the daily recommendation of 60 minutes of physical activity, opting for something like gymnastics or skating could be beneficial.
“I introduced both my kids to a variety of sports,” shares Jane Green from Surrey, BC. “I hoped they would find a passion they could carry into adulthood.” Her daughter, Jemma, 13, has taken up competitive cheerleading, while James, 11, enjoys baseball, soccer, and track.
“The main factor I consider is their interest. What activities genuinely excite each child?” adds Angela Prive, who balances activities for her five children aged between nine and 18.
The individual personalities of children can also influence activity choices. “Some kids thrive in swimming since it’s an individual sport, while others may benefit from team activities to develop cooperation skills,” notes White.
Encouragement to explore
How can you inspire your child to explore new activities? “I suggest exposing children to a diverse range of options,” recommends Blair Niblett, an assistant professor of education at Trent University in Peterborough, Ontario. “Then let them lead in choosing where they feel they learn and grow the most.” Some kids might require additional direction; for instance, if a child is solely interested in chess, it might be wise to guide them toward a more physically engaging activity, or the opposite.
Early childhood is an excellent time for experimenting with various pursuits, as kids are typically not engaged in elite competitions, meaning the commitment level is lower. Short-term programs can also be effective. This approach has worked well for Hilary Beasley’s family in Toronto, which includes her children Keaton, nine; Tanner, seven; and Tanner’s twin sister, Harper.
“The boys were excited about skateboarding, so they enrolled in a one-week summer program. We didn’t face the pressure of a full semester commitment,” says Beasley.
Evaluating programs
How can you assess the quality of an activity? “I suggest looking for programs that feature strong leadership,” advises Niblett. “Ensure the program prioritizes a child-centered approach with compassionate adult support.”
This may involve previewing classes, seeking recommendations from friends or neighbors, or engaging in conversations with those running the programs.
“I make it a point to know my children’s coaches personally and observe their coaching styles,” Green explains. Likewise, Beasley carefully selected her sons’ hockey teams. “We consulted numerous people to ensure the teams were focused on sportsmanship and fair play,” she states.
Knowing when to step back
What steps should you take if an activity isn’t living up to your expectations or your child is eager to withdraw? If your child is feeling overwhelmed or unhappy, or if the program’s leadership is subpar, it’s essential to examine the situation. “Often, it’s related to interpersonal dynamics that need addressing,” suggests White. “It’s crucial to understand what’s truly happening in that activity.”
For instance, when Beasley’s twins were dissatisfied with their swimming lessons, she recognized that the instructor’s style was misaligned with the children’s needs. “After discussing it with the teacher without any improvement, I decided to withdraw them,” she recalls.
In less critical scenarios, encouraging kids to see through to the end of a term can instill a sense of commitment. “We often hear of children flitting from one activity to another,” says Niblett, urging parents to be cautious of this trend.
Avoiding over-scheduling
“Many parents feel pressure to enroll their kids in multiple activities. I often see families stretched too thin,” White mentions. Besides the physical and financial strain of numerous extracurriculars, this overscheduling also robs children of essential free playtime, which is vital and often lacking.
“Children today seem to struggle with independent play,” she continues. “They often wait for guidance because their schedules are so structured.”
Prive limits her children’s commitments and ensures they also have regular breaks. “I encourage them to get outside and play as often as possible, making sure they don’t miss out on their leisure time,” she adds.
Financial implications
A concerning three out of five parents report borrowing money or tapping into retirement savings to fund their children’s hockey or extracurricular activities, or know someone who has.
Recognizing the signs of overscheduling
Is your child overwhelmed by their schedule? Warning signs include frequent headaches or stomachaches, trouble finishing homework, and a lack of quality family time (quick meals in the car don’t count!).
To help maintain balance in your child’s extracurricular activities, consider these strategies:
- Before registering, investigate the total commitment required. How many games or performances will they have? Is home practice expected?
- Consider seasonal rotations for activities, such as swimming in the summer followed by hockey in the winter.
- An encourage your child to select a new activity, but in exchange, they should choose one to discontinue.
- Organize family-centered activities, such as biking or game nights.
- Schedule playtime on the calendar, along with choir or sports practices.
